Our Stories are Re-writing Themselves. Can you feel it?


Photo by Joe Hedges on Unsplash

I’ve been feeling it in my very bones, in my cells – and most deliciously, in my heart. Honestly, for the last 9 months or so, it’s felt like I was closing my heart because I found my tolerance for certain things was ebbing fast. Thoughts around being nicer, more compassionate, more patient, more loving, …. would come up, but it was as if a river rushed in and carried them away as soon as they did. I spent a lot of time by myself because of it.

Now I see that I wasn’t closing or hardening my heart, I was emptying it of my old patterns of over responsibility that didn’t serve me or the world.

Are you feeling anything similar?

I didn’t seek out this change of heart or work to make it happen, it just evolved.

Having said that, I do acknowledge that I have been wanting, hungering for, waiting for a change that I could sense was hovering near the edge of my web. And for the first time in a very long time I sensed that there was nothing I could do to make it happen. Working “hard” at things is something else I just don’t seem to have much tolerance for anymore. What a relief that is! I’d been feeling so old and now I feel new energies and a delightful sense of vitality moving through me.

Do you find yourself letting go of “putting your nose to the grinding stone’? (What a terrible image that expression calls forth!)

Lorna Bevan of Hare in the Moon Astrology writes:
“… your soul clock is reminding you that it’s time. And isn’t it interesting , liberating yet strange to feel yourself transforming from the inside out without working on yourself? That’s right – you don’t need to do anything, or buy a self-help book or start a practice with rules or pay someone else to tell you what you need. Nothing is wrong, nothing is missing – this is what conscious evolution looks and feels like.”


Photo by Nicolai Dürbaum on Unsplash

I feel uncertain moments as I navigate this new field, which asks me to use new tools. But it’s also exciting and I’m enjoying the possibilities.

What new possibilities are you discovering in your field?



Please – Like, share, follow, comment and forward to friends and colleagues. Head shot (2)I’m Coleen Rhalena Renee, spiritual healer and teacher. I appreciate you helping me pass along these insights, teachings and thoughts to ponder.  I’m deeply grateful to all my readers and thank you for your support and for the work you do to heal the world and celebrate its beauty. 

If you need assistance in walking your path visit my website and considering working with me, if what I offer resonates with you. Many blessings, ~ Coleen


On Epiphany – A cowboy, a lasso & Julius Caesar

This morning as I woke up, but wasn’t ready to get up. I lay there, letting my mind wander and easing into the day. It’s Epiphany, I thought. The Christmas season is over. Yes, Christmas is not just a day, it’s a season. (That’s not a tag line; there’s a really old song about it and everything.) Christmas is 12 days long ending with Epiphany, or Three Kings Day. Epiphany celebrates the gifts of the magi to the baby Jesus and an acknowledgement of him as the one who’s coming was foretold. I had my own epiphany this morning.

Right in the middle of this season comes New Years Day. This has always seemed like a made up holiday to me. There’s no context for it in nature. And, it’s so out of sync with the season, it feels to me like it short circuits this reflective time of hope and light. It shoots us into goals, resolutions and hovering failure with a tradition of drinking, falling balls and loud fireworks.

Growing up, New Years Day was the day the holiday decorations came down. Everything looked so bare and empty – and the January blues often took advantage of this window and settled on in.

As I’m thinking about this, I fall back into a light sleep. I see a cowboy. He’s burly and manly. He smiles at me in a crooked sort of way and I see that cheeky Hollywood sparkle off his teeth. He seems to dwarf everything around him – even the horse he’s riding on. I close my eyes and look again. No, he’s a big man, but the horse is bigger. Then, he dwarfs everything again. I realize it’s his attitude, not his size.cowboy lasso

He sits up straighter in his saddle, grabs his rope and begins to swing a lasso above his head. I look ahead of him to see what he’s after. There’s nothing there. He let’s loose and the lasso soars through the air. The cowboy shouts his success, pulls tight on the rope and saunters to his prey. I still see nothing.

He swings down from his horse and giving another shout of victory he holds up a calendar. It’s like a giant sized daily calendar – like a quote of the day kind of thing.


I wake up laughing. The cowboy thinks he’s lassoed time. Then I chuckle at the dream wondering why it came. Ah, New Years Day – the made up holiday.

I realize the cowboy with his American attitude of being lord of his domain was a manifestation in the dream. Historically, he was actually Roman. Romulus started it all by abandoning the lunar calendar and creating the Roman calendar. The science was a bit off. The original Roman calendar consisted only of 10 months and a year of 304 days. The remaining 61 1/4 days were simply ignored, resulting in a gap during the winter season. Later January and February were added.

Like their penchant for straight roads despite the landscape, the Romans tried their hand a taming time. But the sun, moon and stars just keep moving in their own patterns.

Finally, Julius Caesar created the Julian calendar in an attempt to better regulate time for efficiency throughout the Roman Empire – which extended across cultures, hemispheres and landscapes. Despite the quite regular cycle of 13 moons in a solar year, the Roman calendars reduced the year to 12 ‘moonths’. Yes, they awkwardly have different numbers of days and every four years, we have to add an extra day to sync up with nature. But hey, for those who wish to believe, time has been captured and branded so everyone knows who it belongs to.

My Celtic, nature centered heart finds this quite amusing. And to think, the cowboy got back on his horse and lassoed time again to create daylight savings time. This cowboy might have been a New Zealander named Hudson, a German, Austrian or even Ben Franklin. There seems to be a lot of stories as to the origination. Perhaps the cowboy wore a mask?

Certainly, there is a convenience to having a common national and international time reference. We just have to remember it’s an artificial construct. New Years Day is a made up holiday without context to the natural world. To be fair, the Julian Calendar was created before the birth of Jesus, so we can’t blame Caesar for the interruption of the Christmas season. If we lose the magic of the season, that’s on us.

It seems to me that it makes plain good sense to reflect on how we measure things and whether it really serves us. It’s a really good time to return to the syncopation of the natural cycles – to see time as endlessly cyclical and not a commodity with limits. There is ease and freedom in the natural cycles. As we straddle artificial constructs and the natural cycles, let’s keep a sense of humor about it and find our own balance.  ~ Coleen


Photo by Fabian Burghardt on Unsplash

Like, share, follow, comment and forward to friends and colleagues. I’m Coleen Rhalena Renee  – a spiritual healer and teacher. Please help me pass along these insights, teachings and thoughts to ponder.  I’m deeply grateful to all my readers and thank you for your efforts.

A Hard Reality Check

Lorna Bevan is one of my favorite astrologers. Not only does she do a great job with all the astrospeak, she has a beautiful way with providing words and images that help you get what all the star dances mean. She starts each report with a quote, has lovely images, and between all the astrospeak (which face it, most of us don’t really understand) she blends that beautiful imagery and word play with plain blunt talk.

January, she says,  begins “with a hard reality check. You will have to deal with the way life is, not the way you would wish it to be.” Yes, it’s time for a reality check and here’s where I’m taking that:

When someone tells me to get a reality check, my first impulse is to ask exactly which reality they would like me to check in with. I’m not trying to be a smart ass, I just know that reality is rather subjective. Reality is a result of not just the details of what’s in our environment, it’s how we process those details through our own experiences and filters. There is not one reality, there are many. Collectively, we agree on a particular cultural story, but still how we live out that story is rather individual. Or is it?

It is very clear to me how outwardly oriented we have been in recent decades. We depend on the media to tell us what’s real and what to think about it. Yes, I know this sounds over simplified and it is, but relatively speaking, we have become less introspective and self identified than perhaps in any other time.  So, in this time it can feel particularly disturbing when what we have trusted in – government, media, cultural mores, … – suddenly shift.

But, if you can acknowledge that the times are disturbing and let go just a bit, there’s an incredible opportunity awaiting us. We’re gifted with the time and space to ask, “What’s real for me?” This is not a schrodinger’s cat question; it’s not about science. This is a question for the heart.

What has real meaning for me? What makes my heart sing? What makes me feel passionate? What can I not live without (not talking about that morning mocha to get you going)?

What’s hard about this? It awakens us to our wild and passionate selves. It reminds us of our unique significance. It inspires hope. And then,….


Photo by Stefan Kunze on Unsplash

If you’re like me, you start asking yourself why you’ve been hesitating to live out your life to its fullest. Why have you let yourself be distracted by what other people expect? What the hell have you been waiting for?  And then, …

You discover there’s no truly good answer to any of those questions – nothing that will hold up under such scrutiny. So here we are looking at what we know we’re meant to do against the reality of what we have been doing. And then, …

We choose. Do I continue supporting a reality where I’m not fully present? Do I gift myself with permission to emerge; to breakthrough the cocoon of perceived safety; to allow vulnerability while my new wings dry; to ultimately take flight and soar into my real life?

Lorna tells us that “2018 is a year of elemental shift from Yang to Yin escalating the unstoppable collective emergence of the deep feminine.”  I was born to be here on this planet at this time to help facilitate this emergence. My time is now.


Photo by Ryan Booth on Unsplash

I feel a bit like Aragorn/Strider from the Lord of the Rings trilogy. I have inherited gifts, a sacred mission, a people waiting for me to step into the role I was born to live. Part of me would be quite happy to stride off into the wilds. But the reality of the call to serve in the way I’ve been trained and in the way that serves my heart best – the way that brings me deep joy – cannot be denied. To step into it is the only thing that makes plain good sense.

2018, here I am. Simply. One intention at a time.

Does this give a whole new meaning to the expression, reality bites?

What’s real for you in this transformative new year?

“We do not need magic to transform our world. We carry all of the power we need inside ourselves already.” J.K. Rowling

Thank you Lorna for your brilliance! Blessings to you and to all my readers in this new year – and in what’s real for you.  ~ Coleen

Is the Dragon Lady All Heart?

Today we explore the fierce feminine. Now, if you have words like “raging bitch” “bitter old maid”, or “dragon lady” going through your head – push them aside cause you’re on the wrong page!

Here are some places you really want the fierce feminine on your side:

Giving birth to a baby – talk about fierce energy!

Your “baby” (child, project, recipe of your heart) is threatened.

Your life is threatened.

You need to stand up for yourself at work or home or in a relationship.

Survival is at stake.

You’re sabotaging yourself.

Day 8 Fierce

Photo by Christopher Campbell on Unsplash

Before we continue, remember that the feminine is community oriented, has an eye for the long term/big picture view, is committed to relationships within the whole.

The fierce feminine is deeply compassionate and willing to do even the difficult/unpopular things in order to accommodate what needs to be born or protected. She cuts the umbilical cord, frees us from things that bind us, cuts away what does not serve. She makes sure that we have what is needed for survival – what we need to thrive.

Yes, she has a “sword”! Yes, she knows how to wield it. No, she’s not unfeeling or out of control. The fierce feminine is deeply compassionate and discerning. When should we call on her?


Photo by Christopher Campbell on Unsplash

Have trouble saying no?

Still carrying old habits or ideas about life?

Stuck in bad relationships?

Need to find your voice?

That’s right, you’re getting it. We all need a bit of the fierce feminine to pave the way for change when something new is wanting to be born. Her “sword” may be her voice, her eyes, her healing hands, the written word, a song, a scalpel, a conductor’s baton, …

Give her some light. Let her help you face the challenges from a place of deep compassion. Once you experience her a time or two, you’ll treasure her and her loving heart.

Here my story about the first time the fierce feminine showed up in my life.

Blessings, Coleen